Problem with ratings? Get rid of Jeanne Zelasko

The World Series has had problems with ratings in 2006. Part of the problem may be when baseball fans tune in to watch the World Series, they see Jeannie, Genie, Jeanniee, Jeanie,Jeanee, I must cover all bases here(:)), and they have to hear her bitch voice for a half hour before the game starts. NEWSFLASH: WHEN MEN ARE WATCHING A SPORTING EVENT, THE ONLY TIME A WOMAN IS WELCOME ON THE SCREEN, IS IF SHE LOOKS HOT OR SPEAKS FOR LESS THAN 20 SECONDS AND LOOKS SEMI-HOT. OTHER THAN THAT, SHE IS NOT WELCOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, here is Fox, having Zelasko present the trophy, THE TROPHY, the one that says, you are a MAN AND YOU HAVE 'BALLS'!!!!! and here is someone who was not born with said "balls", talking to one who has "balls". IT IS WRONG TO HAVE A WOMAN INTERVIEW A MANAGER WHO HAS JUST USED HIS BALLS TO WIN IN A MAN'S GAME! FUCK YOU, BITCH!!!

I am so upset on so many levels for the lack of men being men in this whole series and the coverage thereof.

I've finally figured out who Ned Lamont looks like

I've seen the ads for Ned Lamont, and he just looks creepy and I'm thinkin' "Who does he look like?" Remember the movie, "Poltergeist"? He looks like that clown that the boy has in his room. He's creepy. "I'm Ned Lamont and I approve this message. Oh and I will wrap my creepy clowny arms around your neck and strangle you!"

Wagner says "What did you expect?" How about doing your JOB!

After Billy Wagner did his usual shit job of pitching, a reporter axed him, "The ninth inning was a little interesting....etc." Wagner responds, "What did you expect?" In other words, "I always suck when I come in with a big lead and let the other team back in the game." How about doing YOUR FUCKING JOB!!!! OH!! OH!! (Sam Kinneson impersonation). Benitez seems to think..........OOPS, I mean Wagner seems to think that when he is brought in to pitch that he only needs to get people out when he's up by one. Get outs asshole.

Bringing in Billy Wagner in a 4-0 lead is liking inviting a recovering alcoholic to a keg party

Where is it written that the "closer" must come in in the last inning, even when the previous pitcher is way more reliable? The very reason one would bring in a closer is because he is unhittable and better than the previous pitcher. If you know the closer is suspect, why do you bring him in? Bringing in Mariano Rivera is always an excellent decision because he is lights out. There are many closers who are not. If managers would just remove closers when they fuck up, maybe they would wise up. Jim Leyland wouldn't stand for the shit that Wagner does. Randolph has to make a stand against Wagner. Oh no, people would say, if you do that you'll destroy his confidence! What confidence does he have now? He can't be any worse!! If you yanked him once, I GUARANTEE that he would get every batter out for the rest of the postseason, because closers have egos and that's what powers them. If you don't challenge them, they suck like Wagner!!!!

Willie Randolph and Tony LaRussa are collectively retarded

I like the attitude Randolph brings to the Mets. I don't like some of his decisions but he is WAY better than Bobby Valentine. Oh yeah, Art Howe kinda stunk. Bobby was worse.

So here comes Brandon Looper in with the game at 2-0, Mets leading. Now, the Mets fans HATE Looper because he stunk last year. Really stunk. Tucker is on first with two out. Looper has already shown that he is wild. 2and 2 count. Looper is most likely going to walk the batter. Looper has already thrown to first like seven times, even though Tucker had no lead and was not a threat to steal. Here comes the 2-2 pitch. Unexplainably, Tucker steals. Unexplainably, Larussa has his catcher have a pitchout. The catcher (who is the best in the NL at throwing out runners, mind you) throws the ball into center field. I'm like, "what the fuck?" Why the hell is he having Tucker steal, when Looper is a time bomb waiting to explode and if he gets thrown out, you are letting Looper off the hook!!! Not to mention, at this point, Looper can't find the plate for strike 3 if he's safe. Why would LaRussa think that Randolf would be stupid enough to steal there? Maybe he's a genious genius (spelling?) for knowing that Randolph would steal him. I doubt it.

Oh, by the way, fuck you Yankee fans

Oh, the Yankees couldn't buy a World Series birth this year? Oh, come here, you can cry on my shoulder.............FUCK YOU! You assholes who don't realize that the only reason the Yankees win anything is because they buy the best players. Wow. Real hard to win when you field a hall of fame team every year. Yeah, well sometimes it goes sour, you arrogant fucks! HA HA!!! Sucks, don't it? Now you know what it's like to root for the Royals whose entire payroll for 24 players is less than two Yankees. Feel their pain, assholes!!!

Tim McCarver is mentally ill

I am a big Mets fan and I used to love Tim McCarver's comments. I used to love Garigioala and Costas, but they all fall in love with themselves and think that every thing they say is great.

A pitch tonight that appeared to not hit Furcal at all and from all the replays, you could not tell at all if it had hit him or not the umpire ruled that he was not hit. Tim, after watching one replay which showed nothing, he says, "It nicked him" or something to that effect. I almost jumped through the screen. How the hell does he say that????? What an asshole. If you don't see anything, say that it's hard to tell, not that it "nicked him". Stupid arrogant ass.

So much of this stinks of bull about Terrell Owens

"The rumors about me takin' 35 pills (pronounced: "peels"), I think, is not true." Now, if you know something to be true or not, don't you say, "It's NOT TRUE." not, "I think it's not true". "I think" means that you do not KNOW if it's true or not. If he doesn't know, then he must have been "out of it".

And Kim saying that he has "30 million reasons not to commit suicide" or whatever she said was so practiced and staged and provided by Rosenhaus, obviously.

Bullshit. All of it.

Holy crap!!! T.O. is lying and so is Kim whoever

What a bunch of crap!!!!!!!!!!!! Drew Rosenhaus is obviously feeding them lines to avoid something. What a bunch of bullcrap!

This may shock you, but, fast food workers are stupid. It's true

I usually trust people to do their job correctly when I'm ordering. This is now no longer the case.

Last week at BK:

"Welcome to bluh bluh bluh, askmdfkemr jsdl;fjl ?"

"Uh....yeah,"

At this point, we do the back and forth, I say I want number one, they say with cheese? I say no. They say what kinda drink.......etc. So I figger I'll cut to the chase and say exactly what I want.

"I'd like a number 1 with sausage and orange juice."
(simple enough, right?)

" # 1 sdfjskl sausage?"

It doesn't help that her English sucks.

"Number one with sausage and orange juice"

Let me explain something here. #1 breakfast is either sausage egg and cheese or bacon egg and cheese. Two choices here.

".....(pause).........You want sausage?"


"YES!"

"bllehusudhlbl please drive forward."

So she gives the shit and I look at the sandwich because I believe that she might not get it. Sausage on a croissant. No egg, no cheese. I'm like WTF!!!


Fast forward to tonight. Mickey Dee's:

"Welcome to McDonald's...........etc"

"Can I have two double cheeseburgers and a hamburger?"

"3 Double cheeseburgers and a hamburger, will there be anything else?"

"No. TWO double cheeseburgers!"

"2 double cheeseburgers and that's it?"

I felt like saying, "ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED?" How stupid do you have to be to work there???? Why does she assume that because she misunderstood the quantity of the cheeseburgers that I would now drop the hamburger? Fucking idiot!

Prevent defense prevents you from winning, Giants. Duh!!!

End of second quarter, Eli vs. Payton Manning, with 15 (?) seconds left, the colts need 5 yards to get the first , to at least get a chance to get a field goal that wouldn't be 59 yards and the Giants are playing prevent. Of course, the Colts get the first and subsequently kick the long field goal.
The Giants should have stopped them from gaining anything on second down and let them run the clock.
Grow some balls, Tom Coughlin and stop being a pussy.

Steve Irwin has been killed, what did you expect?

Irwin, as entertaining as he was, would eventually meet his obvious end. Does anyone feel sorry for the snake charmer when he gets bit? Of course not. His family must have been expecting this at some point and instead of conserving wildlife, maybe he should have been conserving his 8 yr. old kid!!!!

Who cut off Stuart Scott's balls?

I want to puke when I hear Stuart getting all hot and bothered about bitch ball. Please. Nobody cares about the WNBA and ESPN keeps trying to shove it down our throats because they have too many lesbos in that place!

Stuart, grow a pair.

New Hampshire vs. Vermont (Little League) forfeit controversy

According to WCAX tv website (Vermont), "Little League rules require that each player on the team play three consecutive outs and get one at bat or that team must forfeit the game if the opponents file a protest." Now, let's understand something here. The key words in the previous statement are, "if the opponents file a protest". This implies that IF the opponents DON'T file a protest, that the other team would win, despite 'breaking the rules'. This is interesting, because the website goes on to say that "Needing to extend the game to the bottom of the sixth, Place (vermont coach) had Vermont's pitcher start intentionally walking batters and other players were making wild throws to advance runners, both teams were eventually warned by the umpires. Soon after another wild throw by Vermont's pitcher, both Place and the pitcher were ejected for unsportsmanlike conduct." Now, how can the umpires warn and eject players/coach for something that inherently should remain secret until a coach "protests"? THE UMPIRES HAVE NO RIGHT TO DO THIS AND ACTED OUT OF PLACE! This is just another example of umpires hungry for attention and not knowing their responsibilities. The umpires should have acted as though everything was normal. It is the same as when a player slides into home and misses the plate and the catcher thinks he tagged him and the ump should just stand there and make no call. This is because the play is not finished. He is not to tell the catcher, "HEY, YOU DIDN'T TAG HIM". It's not his job. He is there to observe and judge, not coach. He must wait until a play is made. The catcher will then realize, as will the runner that it ain't done yet and then finish the play. This is the same thing. NOT YOUR JOB ,BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oprah the evil whale commercial

They had some Oprah commercial (remember, Oprah spelled backwards is "Harpo", hence the production company name, clever eh?) where she says something about Nate(?) the resident "cutie pie" and his apartment on the next Oprah. Ain't he a homo? Oh, everybody tune in to see the homo cutie pie's apt!!! I have a feeling that she might be the Antichrist, but I'm not sure.

Girls who play tennis like girls are hot!

I was driving through the park one day,
In the merry merry month of may,
I was taken by surprise by a lovely pair of thighs,
In the merry merry month of may!!

Ok, it wasn't May. So there I was, driving by the tennis courts and whoa!!!!!!!!!!! hit the brakes pull over for a second. Two lovelys playing tennis. It is my job as a male to absorb beauty wherever I see it. So I watch a couple of volleys. It is quickly evident that they have no clue. This is very hot. Oh, I love women.

Close caption for El Duque

I was watching the Mets postgame and they were interviewing Hernandez (the Duke). I pushed the mute button to see if they had closed caption. They did not. Can you imagine being the guy who has to write this stuff? "He ........call.....uh ...pitch..............i...........no.......think....um....tro it.........it ok........." WTF? His English is so bad. The sportsdesk guy is like, "Ok and........" he had no idea what he just said. I LOVE El Duque, mind you, I loved him when he was in the Evil Empire, he is a great competitor and am happy he is with my Mets. Work on the Englais dude!

Is lettuce really necessary in a salad?

Who the hell mandated that lettuce must be in a salad. I feel guilty if I don't have lettuce in it. Lettuce really doesn't bring much to the table (pun intended) and many times can be overbearing and spotlight hogging. Nobody wants lettuce to do that. It's kinda like that fat annoying guy you know that you don't want to invite to a party but you feel sorry for him, so you do it. Fuck you, lettuce!

Human rain delays

You know people like this. You are in a hurry and they need to suck 4 or 5 minutes out of your time. I don't have time for this shit. State your point and let's go. Thank God Almighty that I have a great answering machine that, when you are listening to messages, you can hold the forward button and it cuts out all the dead air that long winded peeps leave on your machine. A message that would take 2 minutes is reduced to 30 seconds. You can still understand everything they're saying, which is cool. It's by Uniden. A cheap set, but it works great.

oh! the oxygen channel network whatever ad irresponsible

So here I am watching, "Risky Business" on the Oxygen channel and they have this bullshit ad where this working mom copies an image of her hand and copies her daughter's (child's?) as well and she says something to the effect of, "When I miss her, I put my hand over her hand (copied image) and she does the same with my hand (copied image)". What absolute bullshit! So you can substitute all the intimate moments of teaching your daughter about life in her most formative years by having a fucking piece of paper to replace you??? All because you want to make the almighty fucking dollar? Is it really worth it? You selfish bitch!