It's just a matter of time until Ichiro is lured by the Evil Empire

At some point in time he will be on the Yankees. It is inevitable. King George will put on that Emperor hooded robe and put on some creepy makeup and weird teeth and say, "You underestimate the power of the dark side" and Ichiro will give in. I know what you're thinking, that King George should be Darth Vader. No. Darth Vader was a manly villain and George is kinda wimpy looking, like the Emperor.